I haz them.
I’ve found the past 4 or 5 days really hard.
Monday and Tuesday I’ve been apathetic, lethargic and physically sick. Wednesday night I tried to take a night off, but ended up in the 25 man raid.
And I was utterly miserable. Someone deeply upset me by speaking to me like I was scum, due to me getting annoyed by people still essentially ‘standing in fire’ – not standing in the big massive red circle of Marrowgar’s hitbox, being way out of range (hunters are excluded here – I know the minimum range thing scales up and his hitbox is about the size of Mount Everest) and therefore getting impaled and not freed quickly because they were way out of the range of the melee DPS.
I had an awful night, and steadily got more and more frustrated and angry.
I took it out on the officer’s chat channel and the flames healing channel, so I apologise to Ricc and Zal, and of course to Nyo and Jaz that were taking the brunt of my anger and upset.
I’ve been told by the doctors that a mixture of stress and depression is causing me to be physically sick, so I’ve decided to take a week off life. I will not be doing anything I don’t want to do.
Anyway. DPS standing in fires. This all links back to a coherent point, honestly.
My hunter is progressing. The lovely Jaedia crafted the two ToC crafted bits of gear for me, so I have two bits of 245 (bracers and chest piece), and I pugged a few heroics yesterday. I had enough triumphs to buy my first piece of t9 – I went with the headpiece.
This opened up ToC 5 man and the ICC 5mans to me, and so yesterday the adorable Zalduun took me through Forge of Souls. I managed to grab Nighttime . He also took me through ToC heroic and we randomed and ended up with VH heroic, where I picked up some not-great-but-better-than-my-other boots. At the end of Forge of Souls I forgot to talk to Jaina though, so I’ve got to go and do it all again now. I’m sure Zal will come with me though….right? I really really want a new ranged weapon – there are a few available so I’m going to be repeat running stuff until they drop!
We also spent some time on the target dummies, and he helped me hone my rotation a bit more. I’m managing to hit 3.1k single target which I’m really quite pleased with, and it boosted me after a pretty horrible moment in Halls of Lightning – where I encountered my first nasty tank.
Now, I know people have told me I don’t need to do this, but I am cautious and I don’t want to cause people more difficulty or anguish than I do just by being in their general area, so I tend to say a few words when I zone in, apologising for my DPS and saying I am learning so please bare with me, etc etc. And so far, everyone’s been decent. Most people don’t reply, but I presume they’ve absorbed it, and a couple of people have been really, really nice.
But yesterday, we got to that bit in HoL where the big ymijar guys are, in patrolling twos, as well as the whirlwinding shorter chaps. So the tank pulled one pack at a time, which was fine, but then we ended up with one set of whirlwinders and one set of big guys, I got knocked backwards twice, and somehow, one of the other DPS died. Then another one died, and I was still alive but having so much trouble target switching, trying to work out if I should volley or not, when I saw the healer go down I panicked and feigned. It didn’t work, and I got killed. The tank then went down. None of the mobs were low health either – they were all still pretty high up.
The tank then said – can’t you at least do more DPS than me? – a universal statement to all three of us, as we’d all been hovering around 1.5 – 2k, and he was doing 2k DPS. He was in average ilvl gear of 240 – the rest of us, none of us were above 200 in average level.
I said – I’m sorry, I’m learning, I am trying my best but I’m new to DPS.
At which point he said – 2k is easy to do, you’re just useless.
So I dropped group and went and had a bit of a cry.
So yes. That was my first bad PuG experience.
One thing I did chat through with Zal on vent, whilst we were meandering through instances and whatnot, was how many things there are in this game that simply bork your DPS.
Yesterday, I got: impaled by the rhino guy in Gun’drak, feared in DTK, sword-ed by Svala in UK, frozen in fear by Ymiron, ghoul exploded by the Black Knight, knocked back, silenced and put to sleep!…pretty much every DPS stopping thing that can happen, happened.
This is what I have learnt (including what Zal explained to me):
1. Healing is different. Things that get put in my way as a healer are: damage pulses, damage spikes, tanks becoming unhealable, debuffs, adds hitting DPS, adds hitting me!
2. Things that get in my way as a DPS are: crowd control, silencing effects, FIRE ON THE FLOOR.
3. These things that affect DPS are irritating as a DPS. I struggle so much getting my numbers to an adequate level (although apparently 3.1k isn’t too bad for someone who doesn’t know what the smegging hell she’s doing), that I wish there wasn’t fire for me to move out of, or things to impale me, or mobs to silence me. Because I want to see that number go up! I want to be better than other people of my level, because I’m competitive and I want to succeed. I want to be able to provide my guild with an extra ICC-10 run every week, and I want to be able to do that on my hunter.
4. But if there is fire on the floor – god damn it I’m moving out of it. Some of these effects are unavoidable – for example: getting impaled by Gal’darah in Gun’drak. That’s the same as being bone spiked by Marrowgar – I have to wait until the phase has finished/I’ve been released before I can carry on doing damage.
But if there is a ghoul explosion happening near me in ToC – this is the same as Marrowgar’s cold flame. Even if it drops my damage down to 1k, I’m going to MOVE out of the way, because if I don’t move, a healer is going to cry.
This is all linking back quite nicely now, I feel.
What is the point, I wonder, in hitting 5 figure DPS numbers if you are standing in fire, standing out of range, standing in Deathwhisper’s death and decay, standing in rocket launches on the Gunship? (yea, the rockets are totally healable through but you get my general drift) Because what you are doing – what I am doing as DPS, what any DPS is doing by standing in the proverbial fire – is making things harder.
Now, I know that most people that are going to be reading this are bloggers themselves, or people who actively pay attention to their class and spec and whatnot. So I’m sure most of you have healed/DPSed/tanked/done all three at once – and so you’ll know what I mean by this, and because you know things from a different perspective, you know how it feels to be on the other side of the screen.
But there are DPSers out there, in raids, throwing out massive numbers and supposedly ‘performing well’, but they are ignoring strategies, standing in fire, standing in the wrong place, not moving all in order to hit higher numbers.
So yea – the boss goes down. But the boss goes down because me and 5 others are working our god damn arses off and throwing ourselves in front of the proverbial bullet to save your arse whilst you blissfully stand in Deathwhisper’s Death and Decay for three ticks because you will have better numbers.
Is this me overreacting?
Is my overreaction justified?
Get out of the god damn fire.